I Guess It’s Time to Talk About the Coronavirus (Covid-19) or Beer Virus..

coronabeerpool

Trigger Warning: This is satire. I do have a soul and compassion and empathy. But I will fight you if you start hate in the comments. 

Since I can’t get away from this topic no matter where I go, I thought I’d start a conversation on the beer Coronavirus. (Corona Beer is so mad right now) It’s all on the news, online, social media and in any conversation with anyone. You can’t get away from it.

I have a question. How does one little bat, bite an animal, that animal went to a Chinese market and someone bought it, then ate it and breathed on other people and now we are all going to die from a Zombie Apocalypse? Really? This has the makings of a really bad Netflix Original horror movie with a very cheesy ending. Enter all the conspiracy theories here.

Oh. You think I’m horrible for making fun of something so serious? Have you met me? I run a flipping humor blog! Yes, I feel really bad for those suffering or dying from this virus. But the news stations and social media are making it hard for me to stay serious. Wash your hands and don’t touch your face. Really? That’s all you got? And to think we are having to repeat this because at least half the world can’t do this. Because, stupidity.

This week I went to the store to get groceries. Something we do often so we don’t starve. And the shelves were empty of toilet paper, paper towels and hand sanitizer. But what was fully stocked? Old fashion soap bars! I had to laugh.

But if we are going to be quarantined, I would stock up on the following:

  • Tequila but not for washing my hands with or trying to kill the virus with.
  •  Toilet paper. Because I don’t want to get stuck with the crappy TP that might get left behind.
  • I can live off peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
  • Margarita mix.
  • Bacon.
  •  Chocolate.

That’s all we need for a few months. I feel like as much as I watch The Walking Dead and other shows like it, I can survive. And staying home for a few weeks, with my margaritas and Netflix and unlimited naptime, I can’t see it as being a bad thing. I hear that grocery stores and restaurants will deliver stuff to your porch. I mean that is pretty awesome.

I do feel bad for families with really young children. They will drive nuts. And the pets. No walks and dog parks for awhile. Just don’t resort to playing Monopoly. That game will break up any family. Maybe stick to scrabble. Oh, you might want to make sure you add the Disney+ to your Firestick or whatever you stream with. It’s all about keeping sane!

We can do this America! But please wash your hands and don’t touch your face. Don’t travel for awhile. Trust the CDC to figure this out. Stay positive and stop watching hype media and adding to the panic. Enjoy the mini vacation. But if you actually get the virus. Do what the doctors say and get well.

Lastly, don’t blame Corona Beer. In fact, I need to add that to my ‘stock up’ on list.

Peace Love and Margaritas!

 

11 thoughts on “I Guess It’s Time to Talk About the Coronavirus (Covid-19) or Beer Virus..

  1. I bought a lime today. Taco Tuesday will still happen in my home. Life will go on and if it doesn’t, well…why not enjoy the ride?! And, yes, I bought one-ONE-package of TP today because I needed it and left the rest for the universe to hoard. I pity the poor folks who have never had to make it without TP Squat in the woods behind a tree much? Now that’s a true family picnic on the side of the road experience. Just don’t use that funny looking leaf… UH OH TOO LATE!! And even when we had family picnics on the side of the road on our travels we had to WASH THOSE HANDS! Mom had the water and cloths handy. Real cloths, the kind you rip up from old towels. That’s the way of life before we got all hoity toity… But I am on a rant! HAHA But, hey, if you are bored from Netflix there are these things called books, heck I will sell you mine…just saying… Meanwhile, I am going to catch up on Netflix and enjoy my tacos, no matter the end results…pun intended… breep

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You nailed it. If we can’t make fun and laugh about EVERYTHING, then we will die crying.
    I especially loved your comment about Monopoly breaking up families! I was the worst loser, when I was a kid—I’d flip over the game board and all of the money and game pieces would go flying, like a tornado had hit town.
    I’m a better loser now… 🤓

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I think a quarantine would be awesome! It would be a great excuse to sit on the couch and catch up on all of my reading. Provided, of course, that I was the only one exposed. If I had to be quarantined with the whole family, it might not be worth it. I might as well just go to work.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. OMFG I AM WITH YOU.
    First of all, I hate bats even more now.
    Second of all, I can’t get back the hour of my life I spent in a google spiral looking up a conspiracy theory that the virus was created in a lab (it wasn’t…back to bat shaming).
    I can’t with the fearmongers and fearmongering. Are those even words? Or one words? Or two?
    I am going crazy and I don’t want to watch the news, read Twitter, or even go out in public.

    I feel better. Thank you for this TEDtalk.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. In retrospect, I am certain you meant well. But unfortunately, I see no humor in this at all. I still can’t laugh about 9/11. Something in life, just have no humorous side. Sorry.
    But I know you meant well. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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