Farewell to the Nest, Hello to the Margarita Bar: Navigating Midlife as an Empty Nester

There comes a time in most everyone’s life where you wonder, “what the hell do I do now?”. The kids are growing up and don’t need me as much, I hate my job, should I buy an RV? Is God ignoring me? I want to redecorate my house or move, who am I? why can’t anyone in this house put the toilet paper roll on the right way?! Sound familiar? Welcome to your midlife crisis.

I’ve been there and I’ve survived! I’m working through it. In my mid-forties my father talked me into getting my real estate license. That meant going to classes at night and taking tests. OMG. I went to college, I did my time, now I have to do this????? But I did it. It was not easy, and I had a hard time in classes trying not to kill the person next to me who had to chew and smack gum the entire time. But I got through it, and no one died. Not even me. Passed the test, got my license and at 40+ I started working with my dad in real estate. It was awesome working with my dad, and we didn’t even kill each other. Win-win. 

Now my kids are grown. Both have graduated from college, and one is married. They don’t need me as much now and they are loving their lives. We, as parents, have done all we can do to prepare them for adult life. Now it’s on them. I’ve had the discussion with them that there is no bail money so try not to do stupid stuff. I hope we’ve instilled in them how to treat others and hopefully my marriage has been something for them to model from in their own relationships. While they seem very independent, they still don’t always use the best judgment on things and maybe if they used Google a little bit more often, they might learn a thing or two. But overall, they are pretty good humans. 

Midlife brings lots of physical changes too. I’ve discovered I have osteoporosis now and after I was diagnosed, my doctor told me to try not to fall. Really? The first thing I did was trip over a curb heading to my car after the appointment! She also suggested I do Tai Chi. What? I make fun of people who do Tai Chi. So, I began doing yoga. I love it. It makes me feel better, taller, straighter, and helps me find my calm place (for about 30 minutes).  I highly recommend it. You don’t have to do classes either. You can find videos and poses on YouTube.

Relationships begin to change too. I started to realize that I needed to weed out the negativity and crazy from my life. I let a few people go that needed to go. Not that they were bad people, they just didn’t add to my life, and I didn’t add to theirs. I wanted more positive, real people in my circle. I also wanted my circle to be smaller. I wanted to be more intentional with my close relationships too. You can have lots of friends and love lots of people, but having a small circle of close friends you can trust is a true blessing. Weed the drama out as much as possible. It will always be there, but less of it means less stress in your life.

I feel like I am qualified to be your life coach now. lol Do these things and you will have a great life, yada, yada, yada. In reality, life changes at some point and you have to change too.  Don’t get down in the dumps or give up on your dreams. You are never too old to live your dreams or start a new career even. Find a way. Laugh every day. Love all you can. This midlife (empty nest) thing is not so bad!

Peace Love and Margaritas!

9 thoughts on “Farewell to the Nest, Hello to the Margarita Bar: Navigating Midlife as an Empty Nester

  1. I’m in this stage of life right now… About. One high school kid and one on the way to high school. I find I’m asking all those questions. You’re correct Yoga, weeding out negative people and a good small group of people make a world of difference. The other thing is spiritual guidance and grounding. That’s helped me in all seasons. Thank you for this post… I needed!! I’m glad I’m not alone out here.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Had a whole comment written and WP decided I wasn’t logged in and didn’t know my password. Clearly, Friday has started well.
    I am kinda at the same stage but with a couple of differences … first 5 kids are grown (awesome humans), have great jobs, and have created more humans. That’s exciting! Being a Grandma is rather fun. Youngest two are at home. One is ASD so that brings it’s own fun (and reasons to drink tequila) the youngest is at high school and has ME/CFS. I’m still needed for mothering duty at times!
    Loved the post.
    I’m about to go get lost in the latest book I’m writing because that’s what keeps me sane. 🙂 🙂 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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