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Hot Dogs and Birthday Cake

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birthdayhotdogMy co-worker and I put 60 hotdogs in a crock pot at breakfast this morning for a lunch time picnic. There is nothing and I mean NOTHING grosser than the smell of raw hot dogs in the morning. I seriously had to hold it together and not gag so that my co-worker wouldn’t start gagging too. We made it though and at lunch we all had several hotdogs.

The day only gets better. Thing 2 turns 16 tomorrow. 16! How did that happen? Big Daddy made the cake last night (special family recipe) and I think we were hasty putting on the icing. The cake ended up looking like this: cake

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh well. At least it tastes good. And it’s a good day to turn 16. Sorry Thing 2, no car yet. But tomorrow I will tell him his birth story again. Three hours of labor and no epidural… he loves to hear that story every year. We’ll finish the cake and he and his friends will head out to celebrate. Big Daddy and I will clean the kitchen and talk about how fast they are growing up. Pretty soon we will be empty nesters. (Is it wrong if we are looking forward to that?)

Thing 2 Way Back When
16!

The Hot dog story and Thing 2’s birthday are not related except the fact that I had hot dogs and birthday cake in the same day. Anyhoo, enjoy your weekend and find the fun things in your day and relish them. They fly by. But here’s a little video I found on the webs and I laughed so hard I nearly threw up the hot dogs!

 

Things That Scare Me

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I have a short list of things that scare terrify me. And it all started with this: oz

A little place in North Carolina that became the first nightmare I can remember. It’s a recreation of the Land of Oz complete with a house falling on the witch’s legs. I can still remember the nightmare of my childhood with striped legs sticking out from under a house. SO thanks mom and dad for that.

This place is now closed to the public (making it oh so much more creepy) and opens about once a year for a few days for people to visit and remember the times they spent there as a child. (yay). In case you are in NC and curious, here is the link to the upcoming event: http://www.charlotteobserver.com/living/travel/article77860247.html

So then I got to thinking what else really scares me and I came up with this fun list:

  1. Spiders. They have a lot of legs so you have no idea which direction they will run. They have millions of baby spiders at one time. (Gross) Oh and they can jump too.toiletspider
  2. Tornados. I think that came from the Oz business.tornado
  3. Bats. Creatures from Hell. One time a bat touched my hair and I nearly peed myself. I was screaming like a lunatic and my neighbors thought my hubby was beating me. I kid you not.bat-demon
  4. Jumping Crickets. Crickets in general are no big deal. But when they can jump over your head in a bathroom and you cannot get away and when you do it’s stuck in your hair. I can’t even.
  5. I am afraid one day my doctor will tell me I can no longer eat gluten foods or shellfish. I. WILL. DIE.shellfishmeme.png
  6. I’m not afraid of the dark but I will admit I run and jump in the bed after the lights are out so that demon under the bed won’t grab my ankles. True story.monsterunderbed

So now you know some of my biggest fears. What are you afraid of?

Suviving Summer with your College Kid

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collegekidYou were so sad and proud the day your child graduated from college. You mourned the child that you once carried around on your hip and now he’s all grown up and headed to college. You get through the first semester with him being gone and find your routine again. Maybe you have another child still at home to fill the void of an otherwise quiet house. Things are going smoothly and you are so excited when your college kid moves back in for the summer. Awesome right?

REALITY. He comes home and turns back into a high schooler and you think, “How the hell did he survive his first year away?” THEN you think, “How the hell am I going to survive this summer?”

Here are 7 Tips to help you make it through till fall:

1.       Stock Up On Booze. Unless you are already on anxiety meds. (Do not mix the two, even if tempted). You don’t have to wait till 5 o’clock to have a margarita to relax. Mimosas are a great way to start the day!

2.       Set Boundaries. I’ve read that giving your child a curfew again is demeaning as they have been on their own for a year now. To that I say BS. I don’t care if they live 5 years on their own. I need to know that I can go to sleep and I can’t do that until he’s back in the house at night. Also make sure he understands your grocery bill is going up while he’s home and when you buy stuff he had better not eat it all before anyone else has some. His little brother is now taller than him and can whip his butt if all the chocolate milk is gone before he gets any.

3.       Laundry. O for the love! Laundry just got real again. Have your college kid do his own laundry and do it AFTER the rest of the family. College kid comes last in line to use the washer. Also, same rules as college apply: if you leave your wash unattended their stuff will be thrown on the floor wet so you can get the other stuff in there.

4.       Our House is not a Dorm Room. Yes friends can visit but there is no need to come home from work to 20 guys all over your house eating pizza and playing video games. But they are all welcome to help you do the laundry and clean the kitchen. Hide your booze too.

5.       Make Them Get a Job. Don’t let them say it’s their vacation so they should be resting up and relaxing. They need to make money to help cover those groceries and the booze that you drink to help you cope with them being home.

6.       Girlfriends DO NOT sleep in the same room when visiting. While it’s all great they have relationships and are trying to figure out what marriage might be like, you are not ready to be a grandparent. That’s a whole different set of tips.

7.       Spend Time With Them. Let them know you still love them and want to hang out. Watch Netflix, have cook-outs, go on some trips and have fun. But make it very clear that they have to leave come August and go back to school. Circle of Life peeps, Circle of Life.

Tribute To Moms Keeping It Real

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mothers are awesomeHere comes Mother’s Day again. While everyone is out buying cards and flowers and gift cards to the spa for mom, I thought I would post a few tweets in honor of this day. Moms aren’t perfect so I am sure you can relate to some of these:

*Teri Brown ‏@terilynnbrown

I’m off coffee. My kid wound up with an empty sandwich in his lunchbox today. No peanut butter. Just bread. He said he cried.

*Busty Rusty ‏@RaylaRimpson

When my kids can’t find their sports water bottles, they take coffee tumblers to practice.

*Stef Rowe ‏@stefroweNC

Tucker: My lunch was rotten today.

Me: I didn’t pack you a lunch today

Look in backpack. Find Friday’s moldy lunch.

*Marie ‏@lifeontiptoes

Thought it was going to be cold today. Put child in warm clothes. Child over heated and puked on playground.

*Brittney ‏@britt_eisele

Who else has dropped a phone on a baby tryin to take a pic?

*_HumNbyrd_ ‏@_humnbyrd

#parentingfails>>> My son found pancakes in the frig. IDK where they came from. I didn’t stop him from eating them because he was quiet…

Just some random internet pics on Motherhood.

If you can’t find humor as a mom/parent then you are doing it all wrong.

They Make Me Crazy

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My oldest (Thing 1) is starting to move back home for the summer. His first year of college almost behind him. I’m so proud of the things he’s accomplished this year: starting a bible study, playing lacrosse for NCSU’s club team, dean’s list both semesters and working a couple of part time jobs.

Great right? Well in just one day of the moving process I’ve lost my mind. He brought home more stuff than he originally started out with, lost a mattress on the move home, so much dirty laundry I think he only has 1 set of clean clothes and he’s wearing them, dings in the walls from moving a futon upstairs and our backyard storage house is now so full we are planning a yard sale. I should be grateful that’s he’s home and eventually I will be. Until then I’m gonna drink a pitcher of frozen margaritas, listen to my boys play video games sitting on that damn futon and mourn the clean uncluttered house I used to have. They make me crazy but I’m lucky and thankful. 🙂

Pimpin’ Myself

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Shameful Self Promo (1)

First, let’s talk about the picture. Sooooo inappropriate. But you have to admit it made you chuckle. 🙂 and that proves you have a somewhat dirty mind.

Now let’s talk about me. I am having a blast with my little blog. It may not be all that funny or readable and maybe you’re embarrassed to know me because of my blog, etc. But if you have some free time and your in the bathroom or at work and just goofing off and have nothing better to do. VOTE. I don’t meet like Trump or Hillary, I mean vote for me!

See I joined a mom blog group and they compete for votes. I’m all about pimpin’ myself out for votes. While I’m not really competitive (liar liar pants on fire) I just want to prove that I can win at something.  So go to my homepage of my blog and click on the mommy looking badge on the left side and vote for me. You can do it once a day everyday if you want! PLEASE?

Meanwhile I am hard at work coming up with material to write about and creating fun little pics like the one above. I am also adding fun stuff to my Facebook fan page too. 🙂

Updates: Thing 1 moves home from college for the summer so we will be a full house again for a few months. That means more material for you to read and more $ for the guy at the liquor store. Have a great week Peeps!

 

10 Rules for Moms on Social Media

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Rules For Moms

My kids claim they hate me on social media. But yet I get the occasional “did you like my Instagram pic yet?” or “did you see my snap story?” So they are sending me mixed messages.  But that doesn’t matter because like it or not, I AM on social media and I plan to stay. I mean I was on Facebook before they were old enough to ride a bike. But I have learned from these boys that there are some unwritten rules for moms to follow on social media:

  1. Never be the first one to ‘like’ a post or picture your child puts on social media. Apparently it’s so embarrassing.
  2. Hashtag Etiquette:  Don’t make up a hashtag to try and be funny or witty. Use only normal hashtags relevant to your tweet or picture or post. Example Don’t use hashtags like #hessocuteicouldeathimwithaspoon or #bestmomeverandilovemykidssomuch
  3. Don’t use more than a few hashtags, more than 3 is weird.
  4. Don’t tag your kids on Facebook. They aren’t there anymore.
  5. Never save a picture from a snap story. There will be hell to pay if you do. They will revolt and stop making their beds and cleaning up for themselves every day. Oh wait, they don’t do that now!
  6. They get mad if you accept their friend’s requests on social media. Truth is their friends just want to see the embarrassing family pictures you post. That brings me to number 7.
  7. Don’t post embarrassing family pictures. This can ruin their reputations. (as if they even have one yet.)
  8. It’s not the twitter; it’s just ‘twitter’. No one tweets at you, so never say that.
  9. When posting selfies of your children’s friends moms, don’t put #momsquad and tag the kids in it. Worst. Mistake. Ever.
  10. The rules change daily according to the kids. You have to keep up and always remember what you do on social media reflects on your kids!

 

I hope I was able to help. If you have more mom rules, let me know!

#lifewithboys #boymom #parenting #momsofsocialmedia

Organizing the Free-For-All That is My Life

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Getting Organizedblue

My definition of Organized is:

     *To be able to find my crap quickly in any room, space or file. And it has to look neat and prettily arranged.

Usually my blog is all about my crazy family and weird stuff that happens to me but recently I have become obsessed with getting organized. With that said I am just going to bore you with a blogpost about it today.

So I am working on this huge goal to be completely organized at home. I started with my home office over spring break and pictures are coming soon. Just have to sell an ovary to afford the cool office chair and rug I want. But I must get to my files. There is currently no system there at all. I thought there was but really I was kidding myself. You can see what I mean:

files1

 Then there’s my supplies drawer that is horrendous, just look at that mess:

drawer

 So I have a lot of work to do. I admit I get started then I get overwhelmed then I just need a drink to calm myself and try again. That method seems to work pretty well. So as you can imagine, there is a lot of running back and forth to the grocery store beer aisle and the liquor store. But I am kicking it friends, I really am. I will be organized by the end of the summer, even it kills me.

I truly envy those organizers I see on Instagram and Pinterest. Like check out this site called “A Bowl Full of Lemons”: http://www.abowlfulloflemons.net/2016/03/home-organization-challenge-week-11-the-office.html I want my office to look this organized dammit! Her entire site is loaded with tips, ideas and challenges. Makes me weep with envy of her skills. I’ll get there.

Why do I need to be organized? Is it OCD? I have no idea but when things are all neat and in their own place, I get such a rush. Am I nuts? Remember my post on Bullet Journaling? https://midlifemargaritas.com/2016/03/21/life-goals-bullet-journaling/  I am still working on that and I have discovered cool “planners” like calendars on drugs with stickers and colored pens and cool sticky notes too. I think I may need an intervention.

If you have blogs, Pinterest Boards or websites that are all about getting organized, let me know and help a sister out.

Why I Blog

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not a rapperI blog because my life is so crazy that I want to capture it in words without having to pay out the expense to write an actual book. You know the saying, “you can’t make this shit up”? Well that is how just about every day starts at my house. I live in a house with 4 boys/men. Big Daddy, Thing 1 & Thing 2 and Bailey the dog. All males. Yep, I drink. Hence the name of my blog.

I blog because I like to overshare. I tell way too much and my family is desensitized to the trauma it causes them. We may or may not have all been in counseling at one time or another. Including the dog. Nothing is sacred or off-limits. This is the reason my kids go by Thing 1 & 2. They don’t want their names out there on the interwebs.  So I’ll just post a picture of them here: (I love that they pose with me for selfies)

I blog because I like to connect with other bloggers. There is this whole world out there of bloggers who have the same issues I do. Nice to know I am not alone in my craziness. Sometimes I am just grateful I don’t have triplets or more animals or step kids… and I love to laugh at those other bloggers who do! I mean some days I read their stories and think, “thank God I don’t have that to deal with!”

I blog because everyone needs a hobby. I have friends who actually run for fun. They run before the sun comes up, in the cold, in the rain and when it’s over 100 degrees. I would rather blog about how crazy that is from inside my air-conditioned home office. While drinking a White Russian.  We had a treadmill once. I got tired of dusting it so we sold it in a yard sale to one of those runner families.

I blog because it keeps me busy and from living a life of petty crime. Big Daddy is very appreciative that blogging is a pretty cheap hobby.  I know other people who shop all day and party all night. Or others who spend hours and lots of money on scrapbooking. Is that still a thing? Only Thing 1 has a baby album. Thing 2 will be lucky to have graduation pictures. 

bloglifeThese are some of the reasons why I blog. My intentions are to continue putting it out there about my family and the world around me. Good, bad or ugly. If I can make someone chuckle that was having a bad day, then I can say it was worth it. Worth all the brain cells it takes to write a post, create graphics and pictures and literally pull stuff out of my @33.

Interested in how my days go? Check out my post on adulating here: https://midlifemargaritas.com/2016/03/05/grownuplife/

That’s it for now. Thing 2 just texted me from upstairs with the following: reedtextpants

 

Then there was this earlier about where to take Big Daddy for his birthday dinner:hooterstext

So I am off to find pants for Thing 2 and get my cocktail on.

Peace out. And No we are not going to hooters for Big Daddy’s bday celebration!