It’s Fall and I Need an Apple Cider with Rum Please!

Crap. It’s fall already? But it’s still in the 90s here! I can’t enjoy a pumpkin spice latte until the temp is below 70.  I’m not even done with my Wal-Mart bucket-o-margarita mix. But I am looking forward to whipping up some hot apple cider with a splash of rum. If you’re not sitting on… Continue reading It’s Fall and I Need an Apple Cider with Rum Please!

It’s My Birthday Bitches!

Today, I turned 50! I don’t feel a minute over 3o to be honest. In fact, when I turned 30 I thought my life was over. I had a premonition that I was going to die young. lol Nope. It does help that my grandmother is 96 this year, so I have that going for me.… Continue reading It’s My Birthday Bitches!

They Make Me Crazy


My oldest (Thing 1) is starting to move back home for the summer. His first year of college almost behind him. I’m so proud of the things he’s accomplished this year: starting a bible study, playing lacrosse for NCSU’s club team, dean’s list both semesters and working a couple of part time jobs.

Great right? Well in just one day of the moving process I’ve lost my mind. He brought home more stuff than he originally started out with, lost a mattress on the move home, so much dirty laundry I think he only has 1 set of clean clothes and he’s wearing them, dings in the walls from moving a futon upstairs and our backyard storage house is now so full we are planning a yard sale. I should be grateful that’s he’s home and eventually I will be. Until then I’m gonna drink a pitcher of frozen margaritas, listen to my boys play video games sitting on that damn futon and mourn the clean uncluttered house I used to have. They make me crazy but I’m lucky and thankful. 🙂

Why I Blog

not a rapperI blog because my life is so crazy that I want to capture it in words without having to pay out the expense to write an actual book. You know the saying, “you can’t make this shit up”? Well that is how just about every day starts at my house. I live in a house with 4 boys/men. Big Daddy, Thing 1 & Thing 2 and Bailey the dog. All males. Yep, I drink. Hence the name of my blog.

I blog because I like to overshare. I tell way too much and my family is desensitized to the trauma it causes them. We may or may not have all been in counseling at one time or another. Including the dog. Nothing is sacred or off-limits. This is the reason my kids go by Thing 1 & 2. They don’t want their names out there on the interwebs.  So I’ll just post a picture of them here: (I love that they pose with me for selfies)

I blog because I like to connect with other bloggers. There is this whole world out there of bloggers who have the same issues I do. Nice to know I am not alone in my craziness. Sometimes I am just grateful I don’t have triplets or more animals or step kids… and I love to laugh at those other bloggers who do! I mean some days I read their stories and think, “thank God I don’t have that to deal with!”

I blog because everyone needs a hobby. I have friends who actually run for fun. They run before the sun comes up, in the cold, in the rain and when it’s over 100 degrees. I would rather blog about how crazy that is from inside my air-conditioned home office. While drinking a White Russian.  We had a treadmill once. I got tired of dusting it so we sold it in a yard sale to one of those runner families.

I blog because it keeps me busy and from living a life of petty crime. Big Daddy is very appreciative that blogging is a pretty cheap hobby.  I know other people who shop all day and party all night. Or others who spend hours and lots of money on scrapbooking. Is that still a thing? Only Thing 1 has a baby album. Thing 2 will be lucky to have graduation pictures. 

bloglifeThese are some of the reasons why I blog. My intentions are to continue putting it out there about my family and the world around me. Good, bad or ugly. If I can make someone chuckle that was having a bad day, then I can say it was worth it. Worth all the brain cells it takes to write a post, create graphics and pictures and literally pull stuff out of my @33.

Interested in how my days go? Check out my post on adulating here: https://midlifemargaritas.com/2016/03/05/grownuplife/

That’s it for now. Thing 2 just texted me from upstairs with the following: reedtextpants

 

Then there was this earlier about where to take Big Daddy for his birthday dinner:hooterstext

So I am off to find pants for Thing 2 and get my cocktail on.

Peace out. And No we are not going to hooters for Big Daddy’s bday celebration!

Why I’m a Sucky Friend

sucky friend

If you’re friends with me, you know I suck at being a good friend. I honestly love all my friends and would be there in a flash if a friend were seriously in trouble. I promise I’m not a bad person, but I’m pretty sure I was dropped on my head as a kid and now my memory is awful and I have problems focusing. I don’t remember what I ate for lunch so I sure won’t remember your birthday. Unless I’m on Facebook and FB tells me it’s your birthday.

Here are a few more traits of a sucky friend:

*Can’t remember your birthday. Ever. So anniversaries are out of the question.

*Hate to talk on the phone. My mind wanders when people talk to me for too long. I can’t help it. Text me and I am more focused. You can even Snapchat or Twitter at me.

*I hate chick flicks. I would rather see a ‘Die Hard’ movie or a really dark, scary movie. I don’t like to cry at movies but give me car wrecks and ghosts and I will be your BFF.

*I don’t trust anyone driving. If you want to hang out, go to dinner, pedi’s etc., I have to drive. I don’t trust other friends driving. If you insist on driving please realize I will tell you where to go and how to get there.

*I’m always right. I’ll try to give you unsolicited advice and if you think I’m wrong, well that might not go well.

*I can’t be around friends who do not have a sense of humor. If you are serious all the time I assume you are a miserable person and need psychiatric therapy. I hate to be called out when my humor might be slightly inappropriate. Which happens often.

*I don’t want to go out to dinner with friends who only eat salads and talk about how they have to watch their weight. Boo hoo. Eat a flipping cheeseburger already.

*I like my cocktails. A lot. I get a little louder with each shot sip. The more I have the funnier I am. But then you would have to drive home and then I would have to tell you how to drive and it would just turn into a hot mess.

So if you expect friends to remember birthdays, eat salads and do girly girl things, then I’m not your girl. I suck at being a good friend. Just so you know upfront.

6 Ways to Improve Your Life and Be Happy!

buddha-happy

We all know we should improve our lives, get healthy, work out more, be nice…yada, yada, yada.

Well I have 6 ways to help do just that! You will be so freaking happy everyone will want to know why. Here are 6 simple ways to get started improving your life and become happier.

1.       Eat Healthier. See I said healthier, not healthy. There is a difference. Eating healthy sounds like you can’t eat anything you want. Just the good for you stuff. I am saying you can still eat a lot of the things you love (pizza, chips etc.) but add more healthy stuff in there to balance it out. Vitamins, more water, more vegetables. But don’t deprive yourself of those things you can’t live without. Just adding more water and healthy foods will help you feel you are improving your health a little bit at a time!

2.       Walk every day! Just a quick trip around the block to get your heart pumping really helps the old attitude. If it’s raining, go to Target, Walmart or the mall. If you get in a really good walk, reward yourself and buy something new!

3.       Start saving your change. Or put away a dollar a day towards a nice vacation. You will have something to look forward to. Pick a destination and save up the amount you need to get there. It may take a year or two but so worth it. All-inclusive vacations are out there and there are some deals to be made!

4.       Clean out your Facebook friends. Get rid of the Debbie downers, the people you don’t really like anyway, the trouble stirrers, the neighbor whose dog poops in your yard and they act like it isn’t their dog doing it. It is such a happy feeling when your FB newsfeed looks more cheerful and peppy!

5.       Have lunch or pedicures with the girls once a month. Even if you don’t feel like it. It’s amazing what once a month with the girls can do for you. If you’re a dude, then hit the bowling alley or pool hall with the bros. Friends keep us grounded and sane!

6.       De-clutter your house. You don’t have to do it in one day or even a month. Try tips from FlyLady.com or Pinterest. Just getting rid of clutter a little each day makes you feel like you are really accomplishing something.

I promise if you do these few things on a regular basis you will be so freaking happy! Your life will improve and your friends will see the difference. Be the best you!

*Disclaimer: if these things don’t work, try a 5 o’clock cocktail daily.  Be Happy!